Sunday, January 24, 2010

Sincerely, me.

You. Oh my goodness. I'm lying to the two people I love the most in the world every fucking time for you, and you're okay with it. And then we always have problems, and I know it's always my fault. I mean, yeah, I can handle blame. But I'm tired of this. I'm tired of you. Maybe.. maybe I'm just really tired of us, and all these problems I have with myself, and all these problems you have with me. I don't even know what's up with me anymore. I hate you, then I hate myself, then I hate you for loving the horrible person I am, then you hate me. Repeat.

And you. You're nothing to me. I'm a terrible person for saying this, but really, with all that shit you said... yeah. You're not even worthy for any more words.

You. I met you a few weeks ago but every time you leave a voicemail, it brightens up my day. You say the funniest things. If I could ship you out to your girlfriend, I swear, I would, because that would be my gift to you for leaving me the best voicemails ever. It helps keep me somewhat sane.

K. I miss you. I want to move back so we can watch movies and have sleepovers. I want to move back so I know what it feels like to have a real friend again.

P. I just miss you. Hahahaha. Every single time you cross my mind, the feeling of nostalgia hits instantly. :) And every single time that one song plays on the radio, or on my iPod, I'm just swept away into another world.

H. Ohmygoodness, if I were ever to write you something, like a total compilation of the million reasons of why I love you and am thankful you're back in my life, it'd be a novel.


I wish for so many things, but I guess something I really want is genuine happiness. What am I without it?
Lost, indifferent, apathetic, that's fucking what.

agghh I want to scream so loud.

No comments:

Post a Comment